108 SEXUAL QUESTIONS you should discuss with your partner...An Exploration of SEX and Marriage
An Exploration of SEX and Marriage : Enhancing Intimacy and Addressing Sensitive Topics
- Are you a virgin? If so, do you plan on staying one until you are married?
- What is the difference between sex and romance?
- When you are in a hotel with thin walls and a squeaky bed, are you able to make love?
- What would you do if the man has difficulty with premature ejaculation?
- Do you have a preference between sex in the morning or at night?
- How should we decide what position to use each time we make love? (Take turns choosing? Rotate through our favorites? Try out a new one each week? etc.)
- Are there times when you just want a "quickie"? When are those?
- Do you like to talk dirty during sex?
- Do you like it when your spouse talks dirty to you?
- Are there "dirty" terms that you find offensive?
- How do you think it would affect the relationship if a woman often cannot reach climax? If it was a problem how would you try to solve it?
- Do you think it is important that a couple have sex the first night they are married?
- If it has been a long and tiring day, would that make any difference?
- Do you think that one should mainly focus on pleasing themselves during sex or pleasing their partner? Why?
- What do I do that gives you the most sexual pleasure?
- Do you think it is wise to go to counseling for sexual problems? If not, how would you want to try to work out the problems?
- Do you believe that when a couple has sex for the first time, that some sort of commitment is taking place? If so, what?
- Given your current sex drive, how often would you like to have sex with your spouse?
- Do you have a favorite foreplay activity to turn you on?
- Do you like to cuddle after sex?
- Is there anything that you know of that works as an aphrodisiac for you?
- Is it difficult for you to ask your mate for certain kinds of stimulation?
- Does a person's sexual past matter if you really love them?
- Do you think that you might have a difficult time having a passionate sex life because of a previous sexual experience or because of what you were taught about sex growing up?
- Would you like to have sex outdoors? Would you do it if your partner wanted to?
- Are there any songs that make you think of making love?
- How would you define satisfying sex?
- Have you ever been photographed or videotaped naked?
- How do you feel when I tell you I'm not in the mood for sex when you request it?
- If I felt that we needed to go to a sex therapist, would you go with me?
- On a scale of 1-10, how strong is your sex drive? Is it increasing or is it diminishing?
- Do you have any sexual fetishes?
- Are there certain times of the month that your breasts are sensitive or that you don't like to be touched?
- What kind of clothing do you find sexy? What sort of lingerie/underwear would you find most sexy on me for a special night?
- Do you have any concerns about having sex during pregnancy?
- What method of birth control do you prefer? Why?
- Would you get tested for sexually transmitted diseases if I asked you?
- Do you like to be visually stimulated during the course of making love?
- What would you do if your partner found out he or she had an STD after you had been together?
- What body parts turn you on the most?
- Would you want to do a sexual act even if your spouse thought it was very unappealing?
- Do you generally prefer sex to be very active and hot or gentle and warm?
- Have you ever slept with a person you now know has a sexually transmitted disease (about 1 in 5 adults have some sort of STD)?
- Have you ever been tested for a STD and what was the outcome? If you are infected, how has it affected your relationships?
- Some people think breast and penis size matter when it comes to really good sex. What are your thoughts and/or experiences?
- Do you feel self-stimulation is wrong or only when it is accompanied by sexual thoughts of someone besides your mate? Do you think masturbation is an acceptable form of sexual release when your mate isn't in the mood or available?
- Have you ever been or gotten someone pregnant?
- If you were in an accident and couldn't perform sexually, do you think your lover would be able to cope with that?
- If a man has problems maintaining an erection on a regular basis, what would you try to do?
- Do you have a favorite sex position? Why is it your favorite?
- Do you have a preference of making love in the dark, by candlelight or with the lights on?
- Who would you feel most comfortable talking with regarding sexual problems? Do you think they are qualified to give you good help and advice?
- If you are in the mood for sex and your mate is not, would you rather your mate say "not now" or "I don't think I can climax, but I'd gladly help you get off." Would you ever want to take him or her up on it?
- Have you ever watched a porno movie? If so, how often do you watch them? How often do you look at erotic magazines?
- If you were ever to become addicted to pornography, how would you like me to help you break the habit?
- Are there things that I say or do that lets you know I would like to make love?
- There are many romantic/sex games on the market. Do you think it would be fun to try some out?
- Have you ever had a one-night stand? How did that happen? Do you regret it?
- Are there any scents that turn you on?
- How would our sexual relationship change if I put on a significant amount of weight?
- Do you think our lovemaking should increase when we go on vacation?
- Do you think sex is overrated?
- Do you think you could be sexually addicted? Do you find that sex often controls you instead of you controlling sex?
- Would you want your mate to let you know if you haven't sexually satisfied them?
- How would you want them to tell you?
- Do you think books are a good resource for learning new sex techniques?
- If you plan on abstaining from sex until marriage, what sort of physical contact is acceptable? (holding hands, kissing, prolonged kissing, petting, etc.)
- What turns you off sexually?
- Is it possible for a couple to have sex too often? What problems could it cause?
- How does foreplay enhance your sexual experience?
- What sort of sexual things do you discuss with your friends?
- How do you feel about anal sex? Do you feel it is unnatural and/or unhealthy or do you feel it is a legitimate alternative to vaginal intercourse?
- Is there anything sexually you find wrong, offensive or distasteful?
- Do you usually feel that when we are making love that I am just doing it to make you happy?
- Do you consider these sexual experiences to be acceptable and healthy for your relationship or inappropriate and damaging to your relationship: Oral sex? Sex toys? Bondage? Threesomes, wife swapping or orgies?
- Do you think it is appropriate to use sex as a negotiating tool? Is it ever healthy for a husband/wife to withhold sex from their mate?
- Would you like to take showers together on a regular basis, only every once in a while or do you prefer to take them alone?
- How do you feel about women putting on makeup to make love? Do you find it sexy or silly?
- Do you feel sexier with a tan? Do you think your mate looks sexier?
- Do you think tan, "leathery" skin is sexy?
- How would you feel if your mate lit up a cigarette right after sex?
- Do you prefer your mate to make the first move or do you like to do it?
- What's the biggest turn on for you?
- Do you think you and your mate could or should have sex even though you are currently mad at each other?
- Have you ever had sex with someone else without a condom?
- Are there any forms of birth control you will not use?
- What are the three most sensitive areas of your body?
- Do you think it is damaging to your relationship to role-play while having sex? Is it just acting out lustful fantasies?
- Would you be willing to get your tubes tied or have a vasectomy?
- What do you think are the purposes of sex?
- Do you think answering questions about sex will help make it a better experience for us?
- What do you think is the optimum time in general for the best lovemaking?
- Did your parents ever discuss their views on sex with you?
- Would you ever have sex in exchange for money? For example,
- would you have sex for £100,000? What is the minimum amount it would take?
- How has your sexuality changed over the years?
- What sexual activity have you never before done but would like to try?
- For you, do condoms significantly reduce the enjoyment of sex? Do they help prevent premature ejaculation?
- Do you feel you know a lot about sex from experience or that you have a lot to learn?
- Do you think you would enjoy phone sex with your spouse if you were apart?
- How do you think sex changes as a couple grows older together?
- What changes do you think take place after having children?
- In sex, do you believe that if it feels good that it must be ok to do?
- What places do you fantasize about having sex at?
- How could our sex life become even better?
- Would you prefer more "quickies" or more drawn out sex?
- Would our sex life be more fun if we acted out fantasies, had sex in various places or tried different positions?
- If so, how should we plan to incorporate those changes?
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